Finding Silence in My Heart with the Lord's Prayer

Praying the Lord's Prayer recently took on new meaning when I decided to say the prayer out loud at least twice instead of reading. 

Here is what happened:

     1. My own version of the prayer surfaced -
         "My father in heaven, Holy is your name.
           Help me bring a glimpse of heaven where I walk through my words and actions.
           Thank you for the food you will give me to eat,
            Forgive my sins as I forgive those who sin against me.
            Lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil.
            Keep me always focused on seeking you.
            Your kingdom is forever. Amen.

      2. I liked hearing the sound of my voice repeating the familiar and new words. I could feel the vibrations of the vocal chords in my throat.

      3. Repeating Jesus; words several times took me directly to the silence of my heart, where I rested for as long as I desired, inhaling God's presence until I was ready to continue with the remaining part of my prayer time.

Although I speak the words of the Lord's Prayer in church each Sunday, saying them in the quiet early morning at my desk with my warm, furry cat curled on my lap, has become a way for me to intimately interact, enter and remain in God's presence.

Next time you want to try something new, spend time with God saying your prayers. Listen to your voice. Feel the vibrations coming from your throat and become aware of your heart. Often, I repeat the Lord's Prayer several times. You may find, like I did, that entering into the space of God's presence may lead you to paraphrase the words, giving them new energy. God, can wok through your repetition to bring a personal expression of Jesus' words.

Finally, the Lord's Prayer involves being present. Jesus said, "Give us this day our daily bread." - not tomorrow's bread, but today's bread. We are guided how to respond to one day only, with forgiveness, avoiding temptation, seeking God, celebrating God's kingdom, and honoring God's power and glory

Spending time with the Lord's Prayer, repeating the words slowly, with sensory awareness can assist the descent to your heart, swollen with openness to receive what God wants to place in the morning and throughout the day.

                                     The heart is ready,
                                     Jesus is there,
                                     Go forth in the kingdom,
                                     Filled and prepared.

Word of the Week: Forgiveness

Forgiveness - grant pardon to an offense or offender.

Forgiveness can be one of the most difficult challenges we face. We are wronged. We wrong others.

Forgiveness is necessary for healthy living in body, mind and spirit. Not offering forgiveness can cause physical symptoms as well as harbor resentment and anger.

Jesus talks about forgiving others seventy times seven which means 490 times. I've also heard forgiveness explained like peeling an onion - there are layers to forgiving someone and takes time.

Forgiveness is often a "one way street." We forgive so we can be free of resentment and anger when the person who offended us may not offer reconciliation.

I am presently in the process of forgiving someone who recently wounded me greatly. Initially, I  was overwhelmed, numb, and couldn't event think about forgiveness. As time passed, I knew forgiveness was the only way to get rid of anger and feelings of betrayal about an injustice that was causing me physical symptoms and emotional discomfort.

How did I start to walk along a path leading to freedom and peace?

          1. I began by asking God to help me and give me strength. I knew forgiveness would not happen without God's leading and grounding.
   
          2. Letting God know about my desire to forgive this person gradually shifted the energy in my heart, slowly releasing anger and resentment, allowing room for quiet and comfort.

          3. Know Jesus forgave those who crucified him offered companionship as I walked through circumstances and emotions generated.

          4. Exercise regularly. Experiencing a wrong can create a lot of energy. Dissipating this energy through exercise helps relax the body, release tension and open the heart and mind. The water in the  pool at the Fishers Y continues to support my body as I released anger with each lap I swim.

Wondering how I would know when I had reached forgiveness was a question I frequently asked. Could I think about the incident with less anger? Did I have fewer flashbacks of what happened? Would my physical symptoms that developed afterwards go away?

Although I have not completely reached a place of peace , I know I am making progress, compared to where I was a month ago. My anger is reduced when I think about the person and what happened. Flashbacks occur with less frequency. I have stopped taking medication my doctor gave me because physical symptoms have gone away.

Inviting God into a desire for forgiveness, helped me feel like I was not alone on a difficult path.

Prayer: God, we try so hard to live with love for all we encounter, but sometimes we are wronged by others in various ways, and we wrong other. As you offer forgiveness so freely, strengthen and guide us when we need to forgive others, even when there is no possibility of reconciliation or acknowledgement. Amen.

New Year's Resolutions at the Post Office and With God

New Year's Day I went to the post office to mail a large envelope to Sarah, and a small package to Anna. The do-it-yourself kiosk in the lobby helped me accomplish my mission. Moving to the center counter to complete the address labels, I noticed another woman out of the corner of my eye.

"I'm starting the new year right paying all of my bills on the first of the month." she said with a big grin, applying the last stamp to a stack of envelopes.

"What a great idea!" I replied, wanting to offer encouragement.

She carried the pile to the other side of the room, slipped her payments through the slot and walked out achieving a resolution the first day of the year!

New Year's resolutions can offer challenge or loose steam by the end of January. Here are a few short questions that may re-energize your walk with God as 2015 begins.
   
      1.God's word for me today is __________________________________.
      2. I need to forgive __________________________________________.
      3. Help me bring joy to _______________________________________.
      4. I realize God is ___________________________________________.
      5. I see God ________________________________________________.
      6. My favorite place to experience God is _________________________.
      7. I know God loves me because ________________________________.
      8. I think of Jesus as _________________________________________.
      9. The greatest joy in my life with God is _________________________.
      10. God is challenging me to ___________________________________.
      11. An object that reminds me of God is __________________________.
      12. God calls me ____________________________________________.
      13. I call God _______________________________________________.
      14. My image of God is _______________________________________.
      15. I am in awe of God's ______________________________________.

Like the lady in the post office who began the new year with all of her bills paid by the first of the month, perhaps one of the questions will give additional insights or perspectives about the way God rests with you and leads you into service in the kingdom.

Prayer: God, sometimes it is hard to begin to think in new ways. Like the flowers need rain to grow and flourish, we, too, need new thoughts to deepen our time with you, to know you more clearly as we incorporate more and more of you in our lives. Guide and strengthen our pursuit of your presence. Amen.

     

My Secret Garden

When I need a boost in the middle of winter or any other time of year, I go to my secret garden that blooms all year. I open the door entering a small room cold enough for a sweater or light jacket. I close the door tightly, so the cool temperatures can keep the flowers fresh, but chill me to the bone.

The room is filled with shades of color, and fragrance. Each flower is identified. I am familiar with a few flowers, others are more exotic.

"What color appeals to me?" I ask myself, basing my selection completely on color with no concern for smell or shape.

I take the stems to the counter where a lady wearing a forest green cooking apron gently puts the flowers on a piece of clear paper. She adds fern, then folds the paper from the bottom and on the sides with the same care as if she was wrapping a newborn baby. She ties two ribbons around the middle and seals her efforts with a sticker identifying the store.

While she is preparing my flowers, I notice a shelf close to the ceiling, running the length of the wall, holding a collection of baskets of various sizes, shapes and colors. I realize the baskets will hold a variety of sentiments representing the kaleidoscope of life; I envision a basket of flowers welcome a baby, bringing cheer to a hospital patient, expressing love, comfort beside a casket, celebrating a wedding as a flower girl holds it tight and walks down the aisle - and many more events and occasions.

"Who are these for?" she asked, interrupting my communion with the baskets.

"Me," I reply smiling.

I cradle the bouquet like Miss America, anticipating the beauty of Gods handiwork, gracing my kitchen table.

Mundane Faithfulness

What will you do in the mundane days of  faithfulness? Martin Luther

The Megan S. Ott Foundation was established in 2010. Megan, a native of Noblesville, was diagnosed with breast cancer, when she was thirty-two weeks pregnant with her second daughter. Prior to Megan's death, she, her husband and parents established the foundation to assist families dealing with financial expenses involved with cancer treatment. To date, three hundred women have received help.

One of these women, Kara Tippett, a friend of Megan's from high school, came to Indianapolis to speak the Monday before Thanksgiving. Over eight hundred people came to hear her story of cancer and survival.

Honored to be in the audience, I listened as Kara explained the discovery of a lump in her breast a few days after she, her husband and four children moved to Colorado Springs in 2012 to plant a church.

Inspired by Kara's blog, "Mundane Faithfulness" and her book, The Hardest Peace, I was eager to hear this remarkable young woman, who has persevered through multiple treatments as the disease has progressed throughout her body, most recently to her brain. Although she continues to receive medical treatment, she is living with terminal cancer.

Kara chronicled her faith journey from experiences in high school to how she lives with God in suffering. Her remarkable story of welcoming God into her illness, and hearing how she's been faithful to God, leaned on Jesus and approached suffering of any kind was deeply inspirational.

In a quote from her book (page 56) she and her husband, Jason, are discussing problems with their first church in the Blue Ridge Mountains.

     "In the impossibility of walking through this season of life, I remember clinging to Jason at night and asking him if we were going to be alright. It felt like our hearts were going to break and never heal again. He turned to me and gently told me, 'Kara, tomorrow we get to wake up and be faithful. Whatever each step brings and whatever hard comes, people will always disappoint us. But tomorrow, we get to be faithful in that moment.'"

As Kara's cancer spread and she comes to realize she may not live to see her children grow up, she talks about hope - not hope in a cure, but hope in God (page 78).

     "The stomaching of endless pills feels proactive, and I find myself hopeful in a good outcome, but my hope is not in a cure today. My hope is not in the absence of suffering and comfort returned. My hope is in the presence of the One who promises never to leave or forsake, the One who declares nothing 'will be able to separate us from the love of God.'" (Romans 8:39)

Early in her hospitalization, the day after she arrived in Colorado, she told her husband to return to their children so they did not awaken with the stranger who was staying with them.

     "Alone in the hospital room, in a brand-new town, I remembered a question I had asked a group of young girls I had worked with: 'in the absence of comfort and friends, is Jesus enough?' In that cold stark hospital room, with only employed staff as my company, that question echoed through my mind. The answer was sure and the peace was present. It was an answer I was holding tight."

Kara's honesty and realistic approach to a terminal diagnosis inspires by captivating and illustrating a life lived completely with God. She doesn't deny her sadness leaving her husband and children. Letters to each conclude her book.

I invite you to follow her blog and purchase her book. You do not have to be dealing with cancer to receive encouragement and hope for whatever suffering is in your life.

Prayer: God, help me remember that no matter what I am facing, I have the opportunity to get up each day and be faithful to you. I have the assurance that nothing will ever separate me from you, and the reality of your presence and companionship whenever I am alone is enough. Amen.

The Rising Womb

John 6:25-35 - "I am the bread of life," Jesus told them. "He who comes to me will never be hungry' he who believes in me will never be thirsty."

The week before Christmas, 2010, I made cinnamon rolls to give a few friends. Baking is a way I connect with God, and I was excited to begin. Blessing my hands reminded me I was beginning holy work. After gathering the utensils and ingredients, I lit a candle. I was ready.

My large, brown, glass bowl - the only piece remaining from a three-bowl set Mike and I received for a wedding gift - brought memories of decades of baking. Whenever I make bread or rolls, I use this bowl because it is the perfect size to hold dough that often rises over the edges.

I mixed the ingredients, transferring the sticky dough to the kitchen counter, and began the rhythmic flow of adding flour, rolling the dough, adding more flour until the dough was smooth. Returning the dough to the bowl, now in a different form, I covered it with a towel. 

I was in and out of the kitchen for the next hour. Every time I looked at the bowl, the towel was higher, pushed upward by the expanding dough.

"This is what Mary's womb must have looked like as her pregnancy advanced," I thought. "Here is a picture of Jesus, who eventually called himself, 'the bread of life', right in my own kitchen!"

In that moment, a week before the celebration of Jesus' birth, a familiar expression of Jesus, cradled in a bowl that celebrated new life through marriage, came forth once again in the beauty and mystery of rising dough.

Prayer: Jesus, I love you and the way you come to me, making my fingers sticky with your presence. You are my bread, you promise me daily bread. I set my table early in the morning, waiting for you to rise in my heart and fill my plate. Amen.

Conner Prairie Sheep and Mary's Preparation for Birth

One of the advantages of living five minutes from Conner Prairie is I can visit frequently. My first stop is always the barn. I enjoy petting the animals and seeing the babies born throughout the year.

When I went to the animal barn back in the spring, I noticed a mother sheep resting in a corner of the barn almost buried in straw.

"Why does that sheep have so much straw around her?" I asked the volunteer.

"She is preparing to give birth. The straw keeps the dust settled so when the lambs are born, they do not aspirate dust which could lead to difficulty breathing and possibly death."

Reflecting on this lesson from the barn, I remembered Mary, the night Jesus was born. I believe there were more preparations and care for the sheep about to deliver than there were for Mary.

Mary's preparation for Jesus' birth seemingly looks rather sloppy and haphazard - riding on a donkey during the ninth month of pregnancy, walking around Bethlehem trying to find a place to stay, eventually settling in a stable where animals lived.

Jesus' birth was really the culmination of Mary and Joseph's whole lives. Both knew God, both had hearts that were open to God's leading in confusing circumstances, and both embraced with faith and trust God's design for their lives. Jesus' birth was not completely a beginning, but an ending and a beginning of two persons who intimately knew God.

The workers in the barn at Conner Prairie prepared the area so the mother sheep could safely birth her lambs. The preparation that brought Mary and Joseph to a similar place - a barn and stable - came from years of spending time with God, seeking God and celebrating, even in confusion and uncertainty about what the future would bring - God in person.