Two years ago last May, our family celebrated the marriage of our oldest daughter, Sarah, to her fiance, Ryan. The wedding was in Boulder, Colorado, outside Denver, where Sarah and Ryan lived. We met several of their friends that day, including Adam, who introduced them.
I remember as we talked, Adam said, "I really appreciated the letter you wrote me a few years ago thanking me for taking Sarah to the airport. I'd never received a letter!"
Never received a letter! Ever?
Astonished, I asked Adam a few questions, and discovered Adam is from Denver, had always lived in Denver, so there really wasn't a reason for anyone in his family to write him. The only person far enough away to write was a mother in the Midwest, grateful for his kindness toward her daughter, who was living in his hometown hundreds of miles away in Indianapolis.
Following our return from the wedding, Adam's comment stuck with me. I made a trip to Barnes and Noble to get a book for a friend having surgery and found Hannah Brencher's book, If You Find This Letter.
Hannah and Letters
Letters were important to Hannah. She cherished the letters her mother wrote when she was attending college. In fact, when she moved to New York City following graduation for a job, she decorated the walls of her apartment with letters from her mother and friends.
"Even after I packed the letters and took them home," Hannah wrote, "I always wondered what it might be like to give something like that - a bulging package of love letters - to someone I don't even know. To someone who might never get that sort of thing otherwise. Stranger or not we all need the same kind of reminders sometimes. You're worthy. You're golden."
In her search to find meaning, purpose and direction in a large city, she wondered if other people would like to receive a letter as a way to bring love and affirmation to their lives. Riding the subway gave her ample opportunity to observe the cross-section of people living in New York. She focused on those who looked forlorn and lost, an image of how she felt inside as she adjusted to a new job and acclimated to a new home.
Hannah wrote letters to people she saw, describing her struggles, trying to find her way emotionally, professionally, as she tried to create a sense of place in a large city. She tucked the letter in an envelope and wrote on the outside, "If you find this letter .... then it's for you." She placed the envelopes on subway seats, on bathroom sinks, slipped a few into coat pockets in department stores, in fitting rooms, in the library, all over town.
Over time, the act of writing letters to hundreds of people brought her to a place of peace and purpose and the loneliness that seemed to follow her every step since she arrived disappeared.
My Joy Writing Letters
I enjoy writing letters too. I can often express thoughts in my heart more deeply when I write. Although one daughter moved back to Indianapolis over a year ago, when she lived in Denver, I wrote letters regularly to her and her sister who lives in Oregon. While reading the book, I decided to follow Hannah's example, not only for a writing exercise, but also an activity to expand my heart and deepen compassion toward those strangers I encounter.
Like Hannah, I decided to write a letter, put it in an envelope and drop the envelope wherever I went. Someone will receive my words of love and encouragement.
I wrote ten letters with the message below:
"Dear Friend,
The cloth heart is a reminder you are loved just the way you are. You are valued and loved for all you do. Your life matters to so many and the love you give sustains and provides comfort.
A friend."
I folded the letter and tucked a heart inside I cut from fabric. I often include one of these fabric hearts when I send a letter to family or friends. I also included on a separate piece of paper this sentence of explanation; "A letter of encouragement and love to a stranger - based on Hannah Brencher's book, If You Find This Letter."
Addressing the outside of the envelope according to Hannah's directive - "If you find this letter it is yours." - I set off with my bundle.
I spent almost two weeks delivering the letters, which have found homes in a restaurant, a confessional booth in a large Catholic church, at a local YMCA, a grocery store, on a stack of books at the library, and in a pocket of a jacket at Target.
When I place each letter, I offer a prayer that the person who finds it will be blessed and encouraged.
Interestingly, during this two-week period, I received three letters in the mail; one from a former neighbor, one in the form of a picture from my nine-year-old friend, and a thank you note.
Adam's Letter
My story with Adam's letter has come full circle. Writing a letter of gratitude to him left an imprint on his heart. His comment awakened me to Hannah's book reinforcing the importance of the lost art of letter writing.
Reflection Question
Who among your circle of family, friends and acquaintances would benefit from a handwritten note? Take a moment, put your thoughts on paper, and mail an envelope of compassion and care.
Prayer: God, you give us the example of Paul, who wrote letters to people in the churches he established. He offered encouragement, guidance, wisdom and blessing to each since he was unable to regularly visit. Let us model our ways of expression to others following Paul, so we can have a record of thoughts and feelings toward others they can reference forever. Putting our hearts on paper leaves a cherished legacy to the recipient. Amen.
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